Hello everyone! I am so excited you are here! I just got back from an amazing trip to Ireland with my husband and some friends and the trip really helped me get into my groove. It’s that whole concept that I talk about, the concept of slowing down to speed up. This trip really made me stop and really take a look at things from a different perspective, which is something that I always tell everybody else to do. Truth be told, sometimes I don’t do that myself. But we just got back, and I’ve been thinking about this topic and now is the perfect time to jump in.
Today’s topic is all about the concept of who you are and what that means. Now, I am Theresa Cantley I’m a business strategist, I’m a wife… but that isn’t what I am talking about here. I am talking about more of a standpoint of my identity as far as how I see myself from the inside out is kind of how I look at it. It’s this whole topic around the power of two words, two words, and how super, super, super powerful they are. Those two words are “I AM”.
Just saying those two words can be powerful! I sit up straighter when I say those two words. I remember taking yoga years ago and saying a particular mantra Soham, which means I AM. It is the foundation for everything you do and how you present yourself to the world. I remember thinking this makes me feel good! But I didn’t really connect the pieces until I really stepped into being an entrepreneur.
I have watched so many business owners struggle with this I AM and what comes after it. Here is the thing, what you state is what you create. So the statement you make after I AM is what ends up being your reality. Now we have talked about these things on the podcast before, making the statements of “I’m overwhelmed” and so on is just a self-proclaimed process. All of this starts internally.
Now stick with me guys, I know I have already gone off the rails for some of you, maybe it’s because of my Ireland trip but we need to look internally in order to move forward.
As I was saying, this is something I have seen over and over again and it was something I struggled with as well. These internal sayings and you may not even realize you are saying these things, “I AM a person who needs to prove my worth” or “I AM a person who needs to get ahead.” These all bring me back to that yoga practice.
I remember being on the mat and for most people, your response when you fall out of a pose is “I suck at yoga” or something along those lines. But, this idea of Soham is setting the tone, so instead of I suck, you say “I AM practicing”, “I AM learning.”
This shift in your identity changes who you are. This allows you to get up and try again.
I have told you all before I struggle too, it is how I learn. It wasn’t until years after those yoga practices and until after I started working with my mentor that I learned something about myself. I am a person that can not fail. I struggle with it, big time. But, through my mentor we were able to hone in on some of those I AM statements that were holding me back. What you say to yourself becomes your identity. Remember you are the person you listen to most on any given day, so make sure you are saying good things and not getting stuck up on self-limiting I AM statements.
I work with entrepreneurs all day and I see this on a regular basis, the business isn’t doing well, but it is because of a limiting I AM statement, not the business. In order to counter this I work with them, we go back to the foundation and I ask a question, “who do you need to be?” I help them to identify themselves, we set up these new I AM statements in order to create the identity they need to have to succeed.
I have a client who is questioning herself right now, she asked me today, “What am I doing wrong, I must be a horrible boss.” Now, if she continues asking herself that what do you think is going to happen? Even if she never says this out loud again she may still think it, which will become a belief, which will set her perspective. These thoughts create our reality and that can be amazing or terrible.
I was recently talking to someone recently who has changed jobs and is basically starting off as a leader from scratch. He was questioning himself and who he was as a leader, putting a team together and doing his job. I asked him how he felt about himself as a boss, his response was that he felt lost and like he was a bad leader. BANG. That is what needs to change, setting this identity is how you see yourself and sets the results for your life, your reality. So we “reset” we walked back to when he felt like a good boss and felt like things were going right. That helped us to unravel and fix things.
So what does this mean for you? What can you do to help you using this concept?
I can tell you what I did and what has worked for my clients and me. We need to reprogram our beliefs about yourself and the world around you. Let me tell you, these beliefs have been shaped since we were little. As we travel through life there are different circumstances that shape and change these beliefs and they happen a little at a time and begin to take over.
They start as these small ideas, but once you are saying these ideas out loud, we are at a stopping point. So if you’re not experiencing the results that you want to have, or you’re frustrated with where you are in your business, the first that you need to reexamine is how are you showing up? How do you want to show up? How do you need to show up? How are you actually showing up? What are the things that you think about yourself? What is that identity that you’ve assigned to yourself? Because again, we have the power to choose a new identity at any point in time.
So what I do is I create a routine. I like doing this in the morning–it sets your intention for the day. I give myself 20 minutes every morning. I sit down with just me and my tasks and think about who I want to be in the future and what I need to do to get there.
So if I want to be a millionaire, that is a lot of people dream, I need to think like a millionaire. And I begin with the I AM statements of what I want to be, I AM a TED talk speaker, I AM a New York Times Best Selling Author, I AM a successful restaurateur with a very successful restaurant generating, making a difference in our local community, and generating seven figures,” That’s an I AM statement.
It may not be where you are right now, but when you’re stating it out loud and you can believe it, you’re writing it and you’re stating it, so you’re writing it and you hear it, you’re speaking it, you’re speaking it into existence, and the more you can do that, the reality will then follow in the physical world. That will end up becoming your reality.
Now let me tell you, I have done yoga, martial arts, meditation. I thought I was good with my belief system…NOPE! What I believed about myself wasn’t aligning with my dreams and goals until I started sitting down for 20 minutes every day. I can’t achieve what I want to achieve if I am holding myself back with limiting beliefs.
I choose every day to sit down with my cup of tea and my goal book and visualize what I want in the future. Instead of walking around living circumstantially I am building what I want my future to be and how I am going to get there. Switch your script. Instead of saying things like “I AM so fat” change that into, “I AM working on losing weight” or “ I AM getting healthier” it changes things and sets a stronger empowered tone.
Pair your 20 minutes with something you enjoy in the morning, for me that is coffee… or lately tea. I sit with this thing I love to do and sip my tea and set my intentions. Feel free to start little, three statements “I AM lovable. I AM valuable. I AM worthy of success,” or just, “I AM worthy of success,” when you start off with that and you’re doing it repeatedly you’ll set up an inherent belief that you have within yourself.
By doing this I saw a dramatic change in my business and myself by doing this and I hope it helps you see and change as well.
If you enjoyed this episode and in some way, it inspired you to start taking action, I’d love to hear about it and know your biggest takeaway. Send me a DM on Instagram @theresacantley and let me know what your favorite part was.
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Episode 32 – The Three Biggest Blocks that are Keeping Your Restaurant Stuck
Episode 31 – Keeping promises you make to yourself.
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